Ok, so that may be a broad statement but I think it may be true. One of the most common reasons I hear parents say they couldn't homeschool is that their kids would drive them crazy (I even heard this from public school teachers). I smile and say that I must be lucky.
Well, I realized what they are referring to is a societal problem. Silicon Valley Moms had an article,
G'Head, Hurl those Insults, Doesn't Bother Me, that talked about learning to ignore what your kids say when they are venting. Then it hit me, parents are trained to accept their kids treating them like dirt. Well, most homeschooling parents I know don't! Now I have a few strong willed kids and we go head to head, don't get me wrong. But, they don't yell at me (without a severe punishment), don't hit and don't disregard my instructions with regularity. These things have been known to happen but they are dealt with and it definitely isn't the norm.
What is the secret? Raise you kids to be people that you would care to be around. Set expectations and consequences for when those expectations aren't met (and that will happen). Many parents demand that their kids respect their teachers and friends in ways they don't expect their kids to respect them or their siblings. The truth is that those kids may tow the line a bit but they may not really respect anyone and then they grow up to be parents who have to vent to each other and on their kids.
But, then I wonder in the words of Dr. Phil, "How's that working for you". Then I here disturbing thing like this (from the same article),
And in fact an added bonus is after we have an episode, which with Donovan often culminates in a punch to the gut (he punching me, don't get your panties in a wad), I get spontaneous hugs and kisses, proclamations of love and "I'm speaking to you mommy" and "I'm your friend mommy," a lot of love thrown my way.
So it is just me or does that sound like Battered Wife Syndrome? The other thing is, haven't we settled the matter that venting on someone isn't a healthy way to deal with anger? So maybe you should teach your kids how to handle their anger instead of you learning how to handle their anger.
I guess this is just the basis of why I can homeschool my kids with out losing my mind (though some days 6 hours alone sounds great to me too).
Labels: child rearing, Homeschoooling
